midwife (MID-wyf)

1. a crazy person who thrives on minimal sleep, minimal monetary compensation and high stress

2. a magnet for every fringe group, weirdo, sub or counter culture pregnant couple in a one hundred mile radius

3. one who enjoys handling other people's body fluids and really gets off on placentas

4. a political animal who carries a lawyers name and phone number in a birth bag

5. one who has never uttered the word "no" in an entire lifetime

6. a fearless servant and facilitator of natural birth

7. one who has twenty irons in the fire, juggles, blows bubbles, breast feeds, talks on the phone and stirs the soup all at the same time

8.one who has never seen a complete movie or eaten a complete meal or taken a vacation

9. any one who has three phone lines, a pager, a cell phone, an e-mail address, a fax machine, a post office box, a home address and a CB radio

10. one whose heart melts at the sight of a newborn of any species

Hope it helps! : ) At least you might recognize one when you see one.

wishing you fat babies, Ivy